The Joys Of Being A Lesbian.

I stumbled upon a website that gives you a list of The Joys Of Being A Woman. It amused me for about five minutes and I especially like number 18. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems and number 21. We'll never discover we've been duped by a Wonderbra. Ha ha!

But, what are The Joys Of Being A Lesbian Woman?

• We completely understand what's going on when our girlfriends turn into Hitler once a month, because we do it too.
• We can undo bra's without having to plan a route of attack.
• We can look at two sets of breasts everyday, if we want to.
• We understand that kissing and cuddling can be done at any time and not just as a prelude to sex.
• We never have fights about the toilet seat being left up.
• We double our wardrobe.
• We know what a clitoris is.
• We know what a clitoris does.
• We don't have to suffer through farting, scratching, burping or smelling.
• We know exactly how to answer when asked "does my bum look big in this".

Leaving Home.

I have remembered what else I would like to do before I die. I would like to learn to play a guitar. I would just love to be able to get out a guitar when I'm with my friends, we usually end up singing random stuff anyway, when we're drunk. If I could play a guitar at least it wouldn't sound quite so bad. Haha!


My friend's mum kicked her out a few weeks ago. When I say my friend, I mean the one that passed away, and when I say kicked her out, I mean her mum put her ashes in a wall where a plaque was put up when she died. My friend's mum decided that my friend would have left home by the time she was twenty-one anyway, so it was time for her to go. It's nice to know where she is, and the place her ashes are is beautiful. It's a church that is on the outskirts of the city, so it's tranquil and peaceful. I haven't been to see her yet, it's hard for me to get there because I don't drive and I would really like to be alone. I will go soon, we are both twenty-one. How time fly's.

Kung Fu Bed Frame

My bed keeps attacking me in the middle of the night!

I keep waking up to pee in the early hours of the morning, and when I'm walking back to bed you can guarantee I'll whack my leg on the metal frame of my bed, which looks like this. The bits sticking out always manage to hit my thigh and give me a dead leg. At 3am that's the last thing you want, trust me!

Oh, and I got my Fingersmith DVD today! I watched the special features already but I'll wait until a rainy day to watch the actual programme. :)

Before I die.

I have a to do list as far as women are concerned. OK, it is more of a wish list perhaps. :) But what about a real list? A heartfelt list that shows a little of my hopes and dreams, a little of what I would like to have achieved in my lifetime. Doesn't everybody have a list of things they would like to do before they die? If they don't, hasn't the thought ever entered their head?

It has entered mine. In my lifetime I would like to achieve a few simple things.

Successful career
Go back and visit my favourite place as a child
Go to New York
Go to Paris
Go to Australia
Go to Venice
Get my drivers licence.
Get a tattoo

Simple, really. :) I'm sure as I get older there will be one or two things I would want to add.

Whizzing

I swear, if I have to whizz again within the next ten minutes I'm just going to sit here at wet myself.

Does anyone remember Lutricia McNeal? Anyone? No?

Her song 'Aint That Just The Way' reminds me of when I was around 11/12. I was watching MTV whilst sitting on my suitcase, waiting impatiently until my mum said we could make our way to the church where all my friends were waiting so we could go on our trip.

I used to get so excited. It's nice when songs can bring back good memories. :-)

I Amazoned!

I bought something online today. It was the first time I had done it because I'm quite paranoid about things like that. We'll see how it goes....

What did I buy? Well, I bought what any self-respecting lesbian would buy, of course.... the Fingersmith DVD's. :) Ahh Sarah Waters.... how great is she?

Actually, having said that, I'm reading her new book 'The Night Watch' and I'm almost 100 pages in, but it's crap! There are too many characters and I don't know who they are or why I'm reading about them. I did read in a review of the book that the second half brings the story together, but after reading Fingersmith, Sarah Waters has a standard to uphold. Perhaps that's a problem when you start out as brilliantly as she has. People, like me, expect they will love everything you write.

"Organic" or "Natural"

I was in ASDA the other day (because that's my favourite place to shop) and I picked up bananas (as you do) but when I looked at the price tag they were a little expensive. 98p for five bananas when you can get eight for 50p, what's that about?

I looked at the sticker to find out why they cost more, and realised they were 'organic' bananas. Then I wondered what was so different between organic and normal and found out that if fruit or vegetables have an organic label that means they have been grown with natural pesticides and fertiliser. But it isn't proved that organic food is better for you than the normal food we eat.

Call me daft, but I would have thought food would be cheaper if it was organically grown. No chemicals to mess with for a start.

I know the difference between free range eggs and normal eggs though. And I always make a concious effort to pick up free range eggs. :)

Erica Spindler

I have read two books by the same author and decided they were so good that I just had to mention them.

One is called Bone Cold and the twists were what made it so incredible!

The other is called Forbidden Fruit and makes you more intrigued after every chapter you read.

Breadcake.

I couldn't stop laughing at my mum's story of what her friend did on the coach to spain.

Apparently my mum was sat beside her friend on the coach when she saw her friend pulling apart her sandwich. My mum asked her what she was doing and her friend turned to her and said. "I have forgotten my sandwiches, I wrapped the breadcakes in tinfoil and brought them instead."

If packing a plain breadcake without filling isn't bad enough, my mum's friend had already eaten two of them before she realised what she had done. She said she just thought her sandwiches were a bit dry.

I know it doesn't seem very funny, but I cried with laughter. What s tupid thing to do!

Pick A Number....

I went to a BBQ on Wednesday. It was a really great day and lots of funny things happened. My friend went to sit on a plastic lawn chair, the back leg got stuck in the grass at the edge of the patio slab causing the weight to be uneven, she fell backwards, snapped the chair in half, broke a garden lamp and tipped over a plant pop causing her to get covered in the pots contents. I laughed so hard I cried!

She couldn't help but laugh either.

But the next day, at around 4pm my mobile phone bleeped indicating I had a text massage. I flipped my phone and read the message, but I was quite shocked at who it had come from. It had come from my friend's older brother who has apparently taken a liking to me and stole my number out of his sisters phone!

Damn not looking homosexual enough!

I told my friend what her brother had done, and she tried to tell him that he isn't my type. In fact, he's the wrong sex, but he didn't believe her and now thinks I'm lying and just don't like him. I feel a little guilty, but he set himself up for a fall when he stole my number. Even if I was straight, that little stunt wouldn't have earned him any brownie points!

Missing My Jacket!

My ankle still hurts a little, it will get better soon. Sprains are sometimes worse than breaks though, because it's the tendons that are hurt.

I had a nice day today, I went shopping, then for dinner with my uncle. I bought a jacket-type-thing. Which is here , but it's the white one. I got tired of having to wear a big coat after I lost my beloved denim jacket. I still think somebody picked it up after I dropped it, and I think it was that woman who kept staring at me while she was getting into her car. Evil, evil woman! I loved that bloody jacket!

My mum thought it would be funny to buy me a pair of novelty socks. They say "Coffee, chocolate, men.... some things are just better rich." Haha! I have to admit I do find them funny, maybe I'll wear them. :-)

Remember Me Pillow

It has been quite summer-y today, which I'm glad about. Although it was raining over the weekend. Bleh

I bought a new pillow today, and I'm going to say this once again (as I have been saying it all day) that I feel a little daft getting a pillow for my neck, I associate doing that with being old. I'm 21, but geeze! Anyway, it was ridiculously priced, but I haven't been able to sleep through a night without waking up with neck ache, my other pillow's are quite old, I suppose. Why I didn't just buy more normal pillows, I don't know. Anyway, it's one of those 'memory pillow's' that mould into the contours of your body. It feels comfortable.

Bee Careful!

I was sitting on the livingroom floor yesterday just minding my own business, I think I was messing with the lace on my shoe, when a bee comes flying at me. I was quite offended. I was in my house, messing with my lace.... and a bee comes flying at me!

Sure the patio door was open in the livingroom and the kitchen, but that doesn't mean Mr. Bee can come and attack me, in my own house!

It reminds me of when I was very first stung by a bee, I was in Great Yarmouth on a family holiday (if youc an call Great Yarmouth a holiday) and I went to put my handin my pocket. I felt a sharp stab, pulled my hand out and there was a bee attatched to it!

I'm beginning to think bee's are cheeky lil' buggers!

Grass Cutting Time!

The first avatar of Tara actually fits into the background of the kitten board, so the "I said quirky" part looks like it's floating, super intelligent me, hmm?

Just a few ramblings today, I couldn't sleep lastnight. The last time I checked my clock before I finally managed to get to sleep, it was 4:28am pfft! As if. Well, if I didn't sleep too good last night I should sleep tonight then, eh?

Lets hope....

Also, the grass cutting men were around to day, cutting grass, obviously. Now all the air smells of freshly cut grass, I probably shouldn't like that smell seeing as I'm allergic to pollen, but I do. It tells me that summer is almost here. Woo and hoo!

Oh and I made a Jodie Avatar, just incase a certain someone is being nosey :-p

Warmth Makes Me Dopey

When I know it's cold outside, but the heating is on inside and I'm warm it makes me sleepy, why? All I want to do is snuggle up and close my eyes, it's absurd! It's especially worse if I have a full tummy.

Anyway, something a little more interesting, at least to me.

I was reading Maslow's hierarchy of needs and saw sex as a biological need. Is sex something we need to survive as an individual? Really? I would have thought it was more for reproduction purposes than an actual need. But I found this website interesting, too.

My opinion is that we probably don't need sex, per se, but the intimacey of it provides us with emotional stability. Provided that the sex we have is fulfilling.

It's my opinion, I never said it was right :-p