Thursday, May 28, 2009

Wish Unfortunately Came True.

It was a nice day today, weather wise. I came home, played in my garden, went for a jog, cooked then ate dinner and now I'm sat here eating a strawberry smoothie icecream and doing my thing on my blog. I'm waiting for the TV show Bones to start. Can't say all the hetrosexual baby-making story lines are doing much for me though. Not impressed.

Walking to my front door this afternoon I passed two young children. They were girls aged about 6 or 7, and one girl said to her friend "I'm not allowed to play where my mum can't see me." the other girl replied. "I know, I can't wait until I'm a grown-up then I'll be able to play whereever I want."

I wondered how many times I had said that when I was a child? That I wish I were a grown-up? Too many. Way too many, because my wish came true and here I am, a grown-up with a grown-up job and a grown-up house and grown-up bills to pay. Some things never change though, because I think I'm kinda sorta being bullied by a grown-up at work.... how do you define a childish act in a 'grown-up' environment?

I have no idea on what to do here. Last time someone singled me out as their victim I was 8. I learned karate and singled them out with my right hook.

I got nothing.

Oh, Bones is about to start. Gotta go.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Laugh Yourself a Dream

Two things.

My uncle Simon phoned me lastnight to tell me about his dream. He said that his dream was vague, but apparently I ran away to take photos of people in a circus, and dream me said something to dream him that consequently made him laugh. Simon said he was laughing so hard in his dream that he woke himself up giggling.

How hilarious is that? Waking yourself up giggling!

I love this song!

Friday, May 22, 2009

Look Out Below!

How unfortunate must someone be to get shat on by a bird not once, but twice?

Walking in the city center of Seville Simon was just about to enter a cathedral when plop.... bird shat on him. He was examining the damage when PLOP.... second attack happened!

I was laughing so hard I was rendered helpless. Not that I could have helped him, wiping bird excrement off my uncle's chest and leg is gag inducing!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Traditional Album?

I don't think sitting on the couch drinking wine and laughing at rediculous photos taken of embarrassing family moments in a photo album is a tradition anymore. All of my family have seen the pictures of my holiday, but I didn't actually show them, they just wandered onto my flickr account and had a nosey. In fact, I haven't even had them printed. They're on a memory card and still in my camera.

Online photo albums have made actual photo albums more or less obsolete, I find that kinda sad.

6x4inch bits of glossy paper depicting moments of my childhood are in photo albums in my mum's spare bedroom, but if I have children, where will their precious moments be? On a memory card the size of a finger nail?

Environmentally friendly.

But I'm sentimental.

I had a point but I've lost it....

Monday, May 18, 2009

Glimpse of 'The Life'.

I forgot to add, I had my first Starbucks mocha in Seville.

I was sitting in the town centre watching other tourists struggle to find their way, watching the tram pass me by, watching the locals rush about their day, sipping on my mocha and I thought "isn't this just the life?"

It was the life, back to work tomorrow.


Saturday, May 16, 2009

Picture Tour!

Wow. I have been so tired since I got back that all I've done is sleep. Going on holiday is great, especially when you're there and are laying in the sun, on the beach eating ice-cream and drinking cocktails. But when you travel home and have to get up at 5am to make a 9:55am flight, shit starts to feel a little bit like hard work. *yawn*

Alright, I know, I've just been on holiday. I've just been to Portugal if I'm going to be more specific, I met some kindred homosexuals too. Get that.

Portugal is a lovely place. It's a lot different than what I'm used to on the island of Lanzarote. Lanzarote is made primarily as a result of volcanic activity, so it's not very fertile soil and therefore doesn't have a lot of greens. No grass, only palm trees and aloe vera. Portugal however was full of trees and grass. Amidst the white painted architecture I have to say, it was a pretty sight. Although the grass felt like rubber beneath your feet. Strange.

The Portuguese were very friendly people, so friendly, in fact, that I was offered to buy charlie and/or hash, twice. Yeah, just walking down the street and a guy says "you want charlie? You want hash?" I would have said "you want punch? I look like druggie?" But I assessed my audience and thought better of it.

There were a lot of trips you could take, day trips and over night trips to places like Gibraltar, Lisbon or Seville. We took the trip to Seville and, despite a three hour coach journey there and back, we had a fantastic day. Seville is the capital city in the region of AndalucĂ­a, Spain. I think it is quite possibly the most beautiful city I’ve ever seen. But then again, I haven’t seen that many. The feeling of Seville and the fact that every building I saw had some sort of fairytale story behind it meant that I really wanted to take the pictures in Black and White. So I did. :)

We also took a trip that, thankfully, was only a 20 minute taxi ride away to another resort in Portigal called Vilamoura. I didn't like Vilamoura very much, it seemed to be full of pretentious rich people. Apparently Sir Cliff Richard has a boat docked in the marina. Big wup. I did take some beautiful pictures though.

Last but not least. Some of my favourite pictures of the beautiful sights I saw in the resort we stayed in.

I've never been amongst so many people from across the globe before. I met quite a few Americans, who were lovely and enthusiastic at all times. In fact, one American guy asked me if I wanted to go for a beer after I let him use my suncream. I politely declined being that he's the wrong sex for my particular liking, but the offer was nice, I think. I also met quite a lot of french people, I kept having to fight the urge to ask them to speak their language, it's so romantic sounding.

All in all, fantastic holiday. I would like to go back just so I could take the trips to Gibraltar and Lisbon.

Funny thing, though. On the last night of our stay, I sustained five mosquito bites. I guess the mosquitoes just didn’t want me to leave.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Back, Black and Knack't

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

I'm going to post what's probably going to be an extremely long blog later, but right now I have to do lots of washing. Ho hum....

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

I'm Going to Portugal!

I'm going to Portugal! I'm going to Portugal! I'm going to Portugal!

There shall be zero blogging until I get back.

Oh I'm so excited I have absolutely no idea what to do with myself.


Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Smile, The Phone's Ringing!

I've never been a fan of telephones. That's why I mostly e-mail or text my conversations with various friends or relatives. But where I work, phones are a necessity.

I answer the phone if I'm standing right near it and have no escape route, otherwise I'll pretend I can't hear it and be on my merry way. As for using the phone, I avoid that too.

Despite hating this bloody contraption that aids in communication, I make it a rule to be as helpful and polite as possible when answering a call. But I find that the majority of people on the other end of telephones are miserable, snappy and on occasion, down right rude.

It's amazing, though, how much better I feel when the stranger that answered my call and helped me with my problem is kind and understanding.

It makes me more determind to stick to my policy of being polite.

I do have exceptions though. If you phone me and you're rude, I'll quite happily and easily ruin your day.

Monday, May 04, 2009


One of my MAJOR peeves is when somebody tells me to shh. I'll be mid sentance and all of a sudden ...."shh...."

My blood boils, and to be quite honest I'm more likely to become louder.

So this afternoon at work my colleague was on the phone, I was talking to another colleague at the same time, so I recieved a 'shh....'. The shushing came with a scowl, to which I scowled back and informed them that they were using a cordless phone so they could, in actual fact, get up off their lazy, fat fucking arse and move to somewhere quieter.

All right, I just pointed and waved my hand at them to remove themselves from the noise, but I was THINKING "get your lazy, fat fucking arse off the chair and move somewhere quieter".

Seriously, don't shh me. A simple "I'm on the telephone, please keep the noise down." Would have sufficed. Had that of happened my reply would have been a very polite "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realise I was talking so loud."

Update on the wedding party. I work with 14-16 people (can't remember how many exactly) and only a handful of my colleagues attended. Each of the people who didn't attened were consequently ripped new a-holes by the people who did.

I'm going to Portugal in two days, so my 'give a damn' is on the fritz. :)

Saturday, May 02, 2009

Wedding Party!

I'm hiding.

Tonight is the night of my colleague's wedding party. She got married (assuming all went well) at 3:30 this afternoon. I was invited to the after party, but have dreaded it for weeks for a couple of reasons.

1) Money. Taxi there and taxi back would have cost more money then I was willing to/could spend considering I'm going on holiday in four days.

2) The only people I would have known were my colleagues who are over 40 and all married themselves, the folk nearer my own age had prior engagments(oddly enough).

3) Going to these types of functions when you're dating but not 'serious' is hard, because the questions are plentiful and the answers are lies. "I didn't want to bring my lesbo-crush-date because I didn't want to subject her to your hetro-upperclass-married questions", wouldn't be an appropriate answer, I don't think.

4) I have never been and didn't know how to get to the venue.

5) I felt obligated to go, and I hate hate hate feeling obligated to do anything.

6) because of all of the above, I didn't wanna go.

I do, however, realise this post sounds kinda selfish. It was my colleague's big day, and I didn't celebrate with her for lame-arsed reasons. Don't worry though, karma will bite me in the bum. I have no doubt........ Probably tomorrow when I have to face the people I work with who did go.